Sunday, October 28, 2007

Football Rankings

25. South Carolina (6-3)
24. Boise State (7-1)
23. Clemson (6-2)
22. Wake Forrest (6-2)
21. Wisconsin (7-2)
20. Florida (5-3)
19. Auburn (6-3)
18. Connecticuit (7-1)
17. USC (6-2)
16. South Florida (6-2)
15. Alabama (6-2)
14. Virginia Tech (6-2)
13. Texas (7-2)
12. Michigan (7-2)
11. Georgia (6-2)
10. Hawaii (8-0)
9. Missouri (7-1)
8. Arizona State (8-0)
7. West Virginia (7-1)
6. Kansas (8-0)
5. Oklahoma (7-1)
4. Oregon (7-1)
3. LSU (7-1)
2. Boston College (8-0)
1. Ohio State (9-0)

Tuesday, October 23, 2007

Airport Rant 2

Ladies and Gentlemen, back after popular demand, it’s Airport Rant 2. This time I’m coming to you from jolly old London. Heathrow airport to be exact. I’m just waiting for my connecting flight which is to Glasgow, Scotland. The in thing here appears to be Pink scarves. Or, more correctly, hot chicks in pink scarves. Frustrating about the airport is lack of free internet access. Toronto is also bad with this, but there, I happened to be situated close to the Maple Leaf lounge and managed to steal their signal. For those interested, my flight over was fantastic. The plane was a Boeing 777, and I had an entire row of 3 seats to myself. The plane had personal entertainment screens in the seat in front of you, so you can choose what programming (if any you’d like to watch. I chose to watch Evan Almighty. Not impressed. At all. Other choices included “Surf’s Up” which I actually saw in the theatre and was a much better movie.
A small child has come dangerously close to taking over my laptop. If she could type I would let her, but I think she’s two. At the moment I’m slightly worried, as my connecting flight is not appearing on the big board. I still have almost 3 hours so no big deal yet, but it just seems weird. So there’s really not a lot going on here yet. The British seem to be much more reserved at the airport than the Canadians. No fat guys in Hawaiian shirts yet. Very disappointing. Children behind me are watching some movie on a DVD player. I’m very close to putting on clips from the Swedish Chef, and turning this thing up as loud as it will go. “Een de berggy, smirgen, au da Cheekin en da Baskit”. Oh, that’d be good times.
I’m gonna take an aside here to write about some pressing issues.
1.) Apparently we missed something through 7 books, and Albus Dumbledore was gay all along. Yes, JK Rowling revealed this past week that the character of Dumbledore is gay. What???? This really is the stupidest thing I’ve ever heard. Never in any of the books was anything like this mentioned. No sexual innuendo, nothing. Now with all the books being done, the final chapter written, the story put to bed, Rowling now decides to tell us that Dumbledore was gay? I’m personally just deciding to ignore it. My Dumbledore is not gay. It was never built into his character and has nothing to do with the stories. Rowling, you just made the jack ass list.
2.) The Boston Red Sox have made the World Series, coming back from a 3-1 deficit to Cleveland. This series was really something to watch. In the games Cleveland won they looked so strong. Being up 3-1 with two 19 game winners pitching in games 5 and 6, I thought the series would end there. But those guys stunk. Big time. C.C. Sabathia, what a disappointment. If Cleveland fans can take anything from this it’s that their team is good. I thought that Cleveland had the young talent to be contending for a World Series in 2 or 3 more years. They proved me wrong, and were 1 game from going this year. The future in the Mistake by the Lake is bright. Hopefully Sabathia and the others can learn from their mistakes and grow stronger.
3.) What is harder to pick games at NFL or College football? In the past I would have said the NFL, as parity in the league has made it possible that no game is a forgone conclusion (ok, save the ones the Patriots are in), and the statement “Any Given Sunday” has never wrung so true. But this year in the NCAA has been crazy. Every week, upset after upset. As you may have noticed, I’ve started doing weekly rankings for the top 25. Some of my placings differ fairly significantly (6 places or so) from the AP and Coaches Polls. They may be wrong and I’m right though. Who knows? Come next week their number 8 team may lose and I’ll look smarter for having that team ranked 13, knowing that other teams were better. Then again the complete opposite could happen and I’d look like the numpty, over evaluating a certain team. It’s just so tough this year. A couple things I think. Both actual polls have Arizona State higher than Kansas, but I have it the other way around. These are not traditional powers (ok, Arizona State has definitely had it’s time in the sun, but does not contend for a division championship every year) but both are currently still undefeated. For me Kansas has better quality wins, and looks like a more polished team. I don’t think either of them will finished undefeated, but we make the rankings based on what we’ve seen to date, and if the two teams played on a neutral field today, I think Kansas would come out ahead, so I have them higher. Finally predictions for the big game. My gut still says LSU makes it, even though they’ve looked vulnerable the past couple of weeks. They have also shown a lot of heart, and I still think they are the most complete team in the country. Oklahoma sits in a great position. They are explosive, and I think they can definitely win out the rest of the way, and finish with 1 loss. Whether or not Ohio State can go undefeated is going to be the big question. Michigan is playing some good football again, and if the Buckeyes are still undefeated when they meet in the last game of the regular season, Watch out. It could be another instant classic. My sleeper one loss team is Oregon. I’m not sure if they’ll end up with one loss, but I’m hoping so. This team is fun to watch, and I’m really hoping they’ll at least make a BCS game, if not the Championship.
Anyway, that’s me for now, because I’m gonna go and try and find out what the hell is up with my flight.

Update
I was in the complete wrong area. Apparently there are separate areas for domestic flights (within the UK) and International flights. I was specifically told to go where I did by one of the workers. He lied to me. I'm now in Glasgow. All is good. I bought some cigars in London. Partagas Serie D No.4, can't wait to spark one up.

Sunday, October 21, 2007

Football Rankings

25. UCLA (5-2)
24. Penn State (6-2)
23. Rutgers (5-2)
22. Alabama (6-2)
21. Virginia (7-1)
20. Georgia (5-2)
19. Michigan (6-2)
18. Texas (6-2)
17. California (5-2)
16. Hawaii (7-0)
15. South Carolina (6-2)
14. Kentucky (6-2)
13. Missouri (6-1)
12. Arizona State (7-0)
11. USC (6-1)
10. Kansas (7-0)
9. Florida (5-2)
8. Virginia Tech (6-1)
7. West Virginia (6-1)
6. South Florida (6-1)
5. Oregon (6-1)
4. Oklahoma (7-1)
3. Boston College (7-0)
2. LSU (7-1)
1. Ohio State (8-0)

Thursday, October 18, 2007

Bryan McCabe

Toronto is one of the most hockey mad cities in the world. Most Toronto fans would say "THE" most hockey mad, but that would be a slap in the face of the other Canadian cities (and maybe Detroit) who also are great supporters of the game. Certainly playing in Toronto is harder than anywhere else. The fans and media can be ruthless, and it takes a strong conviction to handle it all well. "Wait 'till next year" has become a common phrase in Toronto, and after only 7 games this year, it's already being thrown about. Torontos' main problem this year has been team defence. And get this, Toronto has the highest paid defence corps in the league. They also have the highest amount of goals scored in the entire league, but are 2nd in goals allowed. The other night against Buffalo, Bryan McCabe scored on his own net in overtime. At the moment he's taking all kinds of criticism from the fans and media. It got me thinking, if McCabe was run out of Toronto, and then the whole NHL what other jobs could he pursue? Here's some ideas, and how they might go.

Things Bryan McCabe could do outside of Hockey


1.) Pool Cleaner. McCabe is clearly good at getting things in a net (the wrong one), and would be perfect for cleaning out a grimy pool. He'd constantly be trying to flirt with the women of the houses, and be repeatedly beaten up by the men. (Just like when Chara threw him around like a toy).


2.) Gravedigger. McCabe knows all about holes. His defense is full of them. I'm sure he'd make an excellent hole digger that any cemetery would love to have. While he's not looking he'd be pushed into one of his own holes by Tomas Kaberle.


3.) Used Car Salesman. McCabe is slimy.


4.) Star of the new show Cavemen. I just think this is funny.


5.) Chauffeur. He'd drive people around, constantly talking about how he used to play for the Maple Leafs, and people used to like him, and proceed to start crying, and then ask for a tissue.


At least somebody loves him.

Sunday, October 14, 2007

College Football Ballot

I've decided that every Sunday Morning, I'm going to fill out my College Football Rankings, just like I was one of the AP writers. It'll be interesting to see how close the rankings compare. I'm not just looking at the Win/Loss records here, but also the quality of those wins, and Losses. So first I present "teams on the brink" (Just missing out the top 25 but ready to fill the spot if one of the above teams falter)

Penn St, Alabama, Rutgers, Boise St.



Graham Brown Top 25

25. Virginia (6-1)


24. Texas Tech (6-1)


23. Michigan (5-2)


22. Tennessee (4-2)


21. Cincinnati (6-1)


20. Georgia (5-2)


19. Texas (5-2)


18. Missouri (5-1)


17. Auburn (5-2)


16. Hawaii (7-0)


15. Kansas (6-0)


14. Arizona St. (7-0)


13. Florida (4-2)


12. Virginia Tech (6-1)


11. Kentucky (6-1)


10. USC (5-1)


9. West Virgina (6-1)


8. California (5-1)


7. South Carolina (6-1)


6. Oregon (5-1)


5. LSU (6-1)


4. South Florida (6-0)


3. Oklahoma (6-1)


2. Boston College (7-0)


1. Ohio State (7-0)


Wednesday, October 10, 2007

The Top 10

10. Dig'em

While he's no Kermit, Dig-em is certainly one of the cooler frogs out there. Funny though, Smacks is probably the cereal I'd least like to eat of all the ones represented on this list.

9. Sonny

Now we're into the real stars. Some of these guys were most memorable for there catch phrases as well as their looks. Sonny had one of the best, "I'm Cuckoo for Cocoa Puffs". Gotta tell ya, Not a huge Cocoa Puffs fan. But Sonny is one of the legends.
8. Buzz Bee
Another cereal I'm not a big fan of, but Everyone knows the Honey Nut Bee.
7. Count Chocula

Finally the last of the Cereal Monsters, and clearly the coolest. What a way to start your morning, Chocolate and Marshmallows, with a little bit of the occult mixed in. If you can find it, watch the Robot Chicken where they do "Zombie Idol" and Count Chocula plays the Simon Cowell role.

6. Snap, Crackle, and Pop

My personal favourite is Crackle. What's up with Pop's outfit by the way?Love the hats.
5. Lucky the Leprechaun

Lucky also had one of the most memorable catch lines, "They're Magically Delicious". A fact I discovered while putting this list together is that there was a short period of time where they actually replaced the Leprechaun with a Wizard. The public didn't take to it as well and after about a year Lucky was back.

4. Trix Rabbit

"Silly Rabbit, Trix are for Kids". Man that poor Rabbit. All he wanted was some Trix. Honestly Rabbit, it's not THAT great. It's good. Just not like Lucky Charms good.

3. Tony the Tiger

Does it get much better than Tony the Tiger? (Well on my list yes, 2 more). But seriously, he had it all. First, he's a Tiger. Kids like Tigers. Second, his cereal was good. Corn Flakes are good on their own, and this guy added sugar to them. And three he has one of the all time catch phrases, "They're Grrrrrrrrrrrreat!".

2. Toucan Sam

Toucan Sam. For decades this guy has been telling children to "Follow your nose". Froot Loops is probably the cereal I ate the most of as a kid. The commercials with Sam were some of the best. Easily one of the top 3 Mascots.

1. Cap'n Crunch
The Cap'N. What more needs to be said? If all these characters were on a boat, this guy would be in charge. It helps, that Cap'n Crunch is my favourite cereal. Long live the Captain.
What do you think? Like the list? Did I leave anyone out? Have a different number 1? Leave your opinions in the comments section.

Tuesday, October 09, 2007

Cereal Characters

Cereal Characters are as familiar as any Saturday morning cartoon character. Many have come and gone over the years, but there are quite a few that are true Legends. I now present my favourite Cereal Characters of all time.
18. Yummy Mummy

One of the Cereal Monsters, Yummy Mummy is probably the least well known. Nowadays "Yummy Mummy" has a slightly different meaning. I love Yummy Mummies.
17. Fruit Brute

Ladies and Gentleman, this is a Werewolf, wearing Green, Orange, and Pink overalls. Nuff Said.

16. Officer Crumb, Cookie Crook, Chip the Dog

Why they got rid of these guys I'll never know. Definitely some of the best commercials.

15. Jean Lafoote

The first Pirate on our list. Jean Lafoote was the archenemy of Cap'N Crunch. His own cereal didn't last too long, but come on, Pirates rock, and he was an evil pirate to boot. I bet that Cinnamon Crunch was tasty too.

14. Quisp

I had never heard of Quisp cereal in my life until I started collecting Wacky Wobblers, and I saw this guy. That is one damn cool mascot. Check out the ray gun on the box. Sweet! And it comes with a free comic? Double Sweet!

13. Frankenberry
The third Cereal Monster on the list. What's not to love about a pink Frankenstein variant? I'm not the biggest Strawberry flavour fan in the world, but he sure looks cool.

12. Boo Berry

Now this is a cereal I wish I had actually been able to try (and apparently you can still order it from General Mills). Boo had a lot going for him. Besides being a ghost which is always cool, he was a ghost with a hat and bow tie. That is the shit man. I'm not kidding, I would wear that hat around if I had it. Boo Berry is the 2nd last of the Cereal Monsters on the list. The final one appears in the top 10.

11. Sugar Bear

Sugar Bear was the epitome of cool. Look at that stance. He's basically saying "Yeah, I'm the man. All you kids are gonna eat my cereal. It's full of sugar. So what if it's not good for you". And check out the Jackson 5 on the box. This guy rolled with all the big stars of the time. Tito, Jermaine, Black Michael. Sugar Bear rocks.
Check back tomorrow for the top 10.

Sports: Writers, and Casters

Sports writers. The guys that think they know everything. The guys that think they know enough about Football, even though they might not have played a down in their lives, to crown a National Champion in College. The guys that have a million "inside sources" and know things about the teams they write about before the teams do.

Sportscasters. The guys that make a game run along smoothly, and add interesting facts and anecdotes. Or the morons that make a game basically unwatchable.

Below is my list of favourite Sportscasters and writers, and just general sports media personalities. They're not in any particular order, just separated into groups of the ones I like, and the ones I'd like to punch in the face.

LIKE


Chris Berman- The Swami. Berman is the face of the best football pre-game show "Sunday NFL Countdown". Witty, as well as smart. Best known for the phrase "He-Could-Go-All-The Way" as well as coming up with some awesome player nicknames. On a Sunday morning, Berman never lets me down.


Ron Jaworski- "Jaws"- The best. Seriously, He is the guy I most like to listen to talk about football. Jaws is one of the best there is at breaking down plays and explaining things to Joe Public. Way better on Monday Night Football then Joe Theisman was.

Tony Kornheiser- Pardon the Interruption is one of my favourite shows on TV. While Michael Wilbon is enjoyable the true star of the show is Kornheiser. His animated rants are often hilarious, and I love how he always thinks he wins every game they play, "I win". His sports knowledge is pretty solid, and I think he's fitting right in on Monday Night Football, basically doing what Denis Miller wishes he could have.


Bob McKenzie- Wait, that's not the right picture.



There we go. That's the Bob McKenzie I'm talking about. McKenzie is the guy with his finger on the pulse of the NHL. When he has insider information I tend to believe it. He's interesting, well spoken, and well respected around the NHL. I wonder if he'd ever consider becoming GM of the Leafs?


Bob Ryan- Ryan is a writer for the Boston Globe, and a regular on ESPN's the Sports Reporters, and often a guest host on Pardon the Interruption. He's the wise old veteran, and Kornheiser has called him "the quintessential American sports writer".

Kirk Herbstreit- Plain and simple the best College football analyst in the country. On "College GameDay" he is a much needed voice of reason, because, well, Lee Corso is pretty crazy.


Guys I want to Punch in the Face (and therefore are not worthy of pictures)
Mike Lupica- What a small man. Petty, and insecure. Lupica makes me want to turn the Sports Reporters off sometimes, which is a shame, because when he's not talking the show is great.

Dan LeBatard (or LeBastard, LeRetard)- You're not funny Dan. Does anyone like you? I doubt it.

Steve Simmons- A Toronto based writer. Get over yourself. You're not important. You want to feel important, like you've got breaking important news, but you just stir up shit, and then look like an ass.

Stewart Mandel- The college football writer over at SI.com. Just go read his stuff. USC bias anyone? Oh no. They lost last Saturday? Screw you Mandel.

Peter King- One thing I think I think: Peter King is a Douche.

Steven A. Smith- The biggest joke in sports writing. The NBA would be so much better off without this guy.